one fell swoop

amidst the hurricanes
the tornadoes and storms
there was a sense of home
for what else is there to know
but a lifetime of cyclones
and sadness amongst joy

then the clouds part
and rays shine down
and I have no need to seek cover
and can walk without shelter
but what do I know
when I’m used to ducking

where do I go
and what do I do
when the clouds no longer
consume

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heavy hearted

my heart is heavy as I remember
when I don’t want to
these memories
and the wrath they bring
I was talking to him
the one from years ago
he mimicked and joked
and it took me away
to that day
that cursed day
and the destruction it brought
so he questioned my silence
but how could I say
that his words of light
brought storms of horror

so I pray for the day

that these memories migrate

so my heart is light

but my love is heavy

they told me

they told me to hold on, with all the strength that I have
but my strength nowadays, is something I don’t have

they told me to move on, and to make room in my heart
but if I move stuff around, it would fall apart

they told me to have patience, for a better day will come
but every day is the same, mundane and numb

allow me this time
I say to them
allow me to heal
and find some zen
a prophecy at play
I hold no power
there will come a day
when words and love are louder