hopelessness

there’s something that I feel today

something I haven’t felt in a long time

it’s like a noose around my neck

it’s snug

but it hasn’t suffocated me yet

this world and its entrapments

this world and its illusions

I can’t partake in this race

I can’t partake in this profound foolishness

I see you all walking

with your heads in the gutters

with your sorrows and guilt

with your emptiness and ploys

and I struggle

because being around you pulls me down

I don’t want to be in those gutters

believing that I’m on clouds

I have no room in me for deception

I have no energy for falsities

but you keep walking

and you keep spending

and I hope that your temporary joys

and man made highs

are enough to help you sleep

and I wonder

if your wanders

mean anything at all

and if you too are ever awake

with this noose of this world

struggling to rest

as you carry everyone’s pain

because I hope you’re not

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